walking home, talking to myself, lover's soliloquy
telling you all the things i need to say but you’re not there, really just one thing over & over & over & over …. We were gonna make a whole world like this. Now, everyone used to come here, but you know… you know what it feels like when all your teeth are falling out really slowly and you don’t realize and then you notice that, well, they’re really far apart. And then one day… you don’t have any teeth anymore. where the fuck are your arms, where’s our real bed that’s not lit by a light i stole?
are you what church folk mean by the good news..?
we live as we dream, alone
it amazes me that it’s a year and we’re still discovering things to love and to hate, watching michael j. fox and whispering into my ears about australia, awful upholstery and running to the liquor shop with the girls in pouring rain, i was always the one to run first into the oncoming traffic and making jokes against christmas lights in shopwindows about going on dates in internet cafes, it’s still sad and it’s still hard but it’s not much longer now. i only read magazines with shoots of things that remind me of myself, models in tutus and circus rings with men dressed as dancing bears; girls feigning injury with oversized bows on their heads and summer as it comes with black lace and bones, jewellery from toy shops and chain smoking, chain reading, chain sleeping, the shoot of lee lee sobieski in the bath and she looks like she’s been shot, i’d leave the lights on for you and my book would fall open with the pages unturned and nothing mattered except watching the sun fall when i woke up in the afternoons, the sunset behind that cross through the window… save places for me.
